New medium
Robbie tells me that if I keep doing the same things I'll always get the same results.That is so true; in life and in art.
I stopped at a Value Village and bought some random oil pastels.I've never used oil pastels before.So this was it then, I grabbed those pastels, put on the ring Chloe made for me for strength, sat in the desert at sunrise, and tentatively made a stroke on the paper.
About 20 minutes later I decided there must be more to these pastels that I don't know about. A way to smudge them together and decided to grab my chalk smudge sticks for the next day.
But this first day painting in the desert with those oil pastels was amazing and freeing.
I drove around from place to place stopping, walking, painting, sketching...exploring.
Slowly, the sun is staring to come back to my soul.
Attempted Crisis Management: Alone in the Cascades
There's this meditation guru who says, "if you are breathing there's actually more right with you than wrong with you."
My wellness Dr asked me to think about what it would be like to wake up one morning as just myself. Not Veronica the artist, the mother, the daughter, the partner. Take all the identity stuff and strip it away.Can you do that in your mind for yourself?Strange, right? And frightening.It's like taking off all your armour and then all your make-up and then all your clothes.It's protection, right?
In this cute little tourist town, there are all these cute little shops with cute little touristy things, and I saw this flowery sign which reads, "Grow Where You're Planted".I'm thinking about that sign a lot these days. Like when I hiked pass this log. It's a banquet table for some squirrel or chipmunk who strips the seeds from the pines and scatters the remains around. Or maybe the wind blows them somewhere.
And the seeds are watered and then they sprout and makes the best of the situation and grow...
I was hiking thru these beautiful forests of huge douglas firs and ponderosa pines. Strikingly majesting 200ft tall trees.Are they the lucky ones or did they try harder than the rest?
Below a bridge across the Icicle River is a small rock island and on that island is a ponderosa pine.He will probably never reach his potential. Or maybe he has. Maybe that's his potential.I stood on the bridge looking down and wondering what is keeping him grounded. Wondering if he ever thinks of letting go and allowing the icy lullaby to put him to rest.Wondering if he ever laments his fate; his cross to bear for being blown onto this wretched rock.Maybe he's connected to the rest of the forest somehow thru the rock.Maybe the rest of the forest helps keep his spirits up.Maybe he doesn't have spirits, feelings. Maybe he's ok with that.
I can pretty much guarantee I'd let go if I was that tree.Good thing I don't have to grow where I'm planted.I'm not sure what I'm getting at, but I'll keep thinking on it for a few days and knocking it around.
Hiked: 17.5 milesAte: SchnitzelRead: Eaten By a Giant Clam by Joseph Cummins, and I Am Her Tribe by Danielle Doby
What the hell? Yeah, I know!
I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry.I'm alive!All is well.When my mother mentions that I haven't written a post in ages, I feel vaguely guilty but don't worry too much.When Robert tells me that he loves rereading my posts I think aw, poor boy away from me, but we talk every day, so put off writing.When our neighbour pops round the cottage to make sure we're alive and mentions that I haven't written in ages, and when my sweet cousin in Slovakia starts emailing me to find out if all is well!!!!Then I know I've been putting blogging off for far too long.
On of the major reasons I blog is to have a creative outlet.But when other creative outlets are briming over the top, I don't feel the need to blog.
I know that's bad.But it's good in another way. It means I'm finding interesting, creative and fulfilling things in my art practice.
But back to life...lol.Chloe's boyfriend Bryson turned 26 the other week, and Chloe planned, organised and executed the best surprise party for him.
There were way too many 20-30 somethings in the house all having a brilliant time.
And that very same evening, my daughter Kerstin and her family came into town to stay with me.
Everyone stayed up way too late, (and our little ones slept in; which was fantastic), and the next morning we had a tea party in the living room.
Weekend came and went and I retreated back into the studio because I'm working on some over-the-top expressive pieces to break out of a rut.
These I had done and put them up on the dining room wall for my meeting with my art consultant.We had a really good meeting talking about the directing I might want to take my art.
I know this is a quick catch up and doesn't make up for two month of radio silence from me.Life...eh?I'll be better.
Hello from Sunday night. Oh the drama to get here!
This definitely fits into my "if you can believe this!" category.The day came too quickly, and I had to return to Vancouver and leave Robert for a few months, so he drove me to Heathrow, I went up to the British Airways counter...and, after three hours of waiting, there was no seat on my plane for me.Well, if you can believe this: BA had two planes grounded because of freezing weather-related problems and put two smaller planes on the routes, and this meant that a few people got booted from their flights and treated to three hours waiting at Heathrow with all their luggage, and then being bussed to the Holiday Inn for the night.
Happily, I had a day spare between leaving England and a very important CT scan in Vancouver, but I only had the one day spare. As BA couldn't guarantee a seat on the next day flight because of priority backlog and sold out planes, I had no choice but to take American Airlines to LA and Air Canada from LA to Vancouver. I walked up to the AA counter at which point the man working there looked at me funny as there were no more AA planes going out, and asked me if I was there to check in. I told him that in all probability I was there to cause him problems and he laughed and booked me a seat on the AA flight.So, faced with 16 hours of flight adventure, I took the bus to the hotel, made myself at home, had supper and a bath, and an early night.
I must say that BA is very organised when they cannot accommodate a passenger.They had coupons for the bus trips, for supper, breakfast and lunch, a couple coupons for a drink at the airport and practically a full refund on a prepaid Mastercard as compensation.
So back to Heathrow the next morning. I went to queue up to drop my luggage off and an AA security clerk gave me the third degree with 20 questions. Wow, never had the third degree from a specialised security clerk. Apparently necessary for entering into America.
But finally, I was on my American Airlines flight to LA.
And, I must tell you something else. I couldn't upgrade because the flight was full, but that nice man booked me into a bulkhead seat where I had so much room that I could totally stretch out my legs!
So four movies and 12 hours later, we landed in LAX.I had a 3 hour layover and was actually looking forward to popping outside for a little California sunshine, lol.Dammit!
So no sunshine.I got my luggage, cleared it thru customs, forgot about an orange, had to surrender it at the agricultural customs, had to have my luggage xrayed again, collected my luggage....and realised I had left my iPad pro on board the plane!So by this time I had about an hour and 20 minutes before my Air Canada connection.I forwarded my luggage onto the AC flight and sprinted to the AA counter to have them call the plane to get my iPad.By then it was 45 minutes to my connecting flight, and guess what? The iPad would take at least an hour to clear thru customs!Dammit!A good talk with security to find out how best to get the iPad back, I had to leave it behind and get on my AC flight.Got to Vancouver...but, despite checking my luggage thru, my luggage stayed in LA.
So I walked out of the airport with my purse, camera case and on-board bag to a great big hug from Chloe, and we went home.The next morning, I drove X town, taught my first wellness journal class of 2018, went to my CT scan, and got home at 8pm.No luggage.The next day I chased down my luggage, which was promised between 3pm and 8pm, and it finally came at 10:30 that night!
But hey, it's all here, nothing broken, all unpacked, laundry done.My iPad is still in LAX, but thanks to the ingenious brains who are my FB friends, it turns out that a company in Blaine Washington will recieve it for me and I just have to pop over the border to pick it up.
And all is good. Except that I finally did succumb to that nasty cold which I managed to avoid in the UK. I suppose 16 hours of sardine can air flights will pass the germs around like no other.So I took the weekend to rest in bed and Chloe brought me an orange, turmeric and ginger power shot from The Juicery and two anti cold juices.I've been absolutely overdosing on the vitamin C and taking my zinc and so I think this cold is on its way out the door.
I haven't got time to be sick.Besides, now I have to prepare to film a little video for Opus Arts, paint 10 paintings for a late Feb meeting with my art counselor, and drive down to Blaine to retrieve my iPad!So, how was your week? :D
Hello, and, where the hell have I been this November?
Hi everybody,well, this is a fine mess, isn't it?
I haven't written for ages.Halloween came and went, November came and went, and radio silence from me.Actually, things are happening around me and I'm part of that world but I'm walking thru it in my usual fog of melancholy and depression; except that some days that fog turns supernova.It's taken November for the supernova to burn out. Nobody can do a supernova of depression like me!
So here is a little look back at November on my last morning in Vancouver. Later today I'm off to the UK.November started with Hollywood North right in my front yard.We had streets and streets of movie trucks block up the hood for a week.
They were shooting The Dog's Way Home in the park on the corner and constructed an entire derelict cabin complete with long grass and chainlink fencing.Apart from the no parking zone in front of my house, it was fun watching the movie being made. OMG that's some serious money and equipment and days and hours of prep and filming for one 20 minute section of film. No wonder movies cost so many millions to produce.
I taught two therapy journal sessions.
I'm really grateful for the time I get to work with all sorts of incredible people who are looking to find a way back to being able to express themselves when things look dark in their life. And I'm so happy to learn that my course is the most requested and most popular wellness course right now.
It was Kerstin and Adam's wedding anniversary, so they dropped our little girls off with us and headed down to Seattle for a nice long weekend.The girls were excited to be with us but the little Ziglet got a bit upset to see her parents leave,
so we made smoothies to make things better.
And then we got the ancient marionettes and had a puppet show.
Other times we just hung out and let the girls have their video games.
We did spend a lot of time in the studio drawing,
and, because their playroom in right beside my studio, I thought I might fit in a bit of drawing.
Nope, the girls and the toys won me over each time.
We didn't spend all weekend at home though. We had Sbux picnics and stopped at my friend Dalyce's bookstore, Booklovers, for armloads of books.
And we took them to the climbing gym.This first photo I took of Chloe and Bryson explaining to the girls the rules of climbing is hilarious. The girls look so unsure! Like, "you want us to do what?"
But as soon as we took them into the practice cave, they were off! Spider monkeys all three of them.
And they loved watching auntie Chloe climb more difficult routes.
Within the hour, Ever was reaching the top of the easier routes. Isla was a little unsure about going higher than our hands could reach, but still managed to touch the top hold, and little Zoe most favourite thing in the world was squishing the chalk bag and putting white handprints on my black leggings.
I had some art success this month. I was accepted for one solo show but turned down for three others.That's always so crushing to me. So I asked a renowned art consultant for help.She advised me to completely change my subject and style.I know she's right, but it didn't help the supernova to burn itself out.
So I went out and bought a bunch of lilies and peonies and drew and drew and drew.
I did get somewhere and that helped a lot. It's been ages since I just drew for hours just for the pleasure of drawing.
In the middle of November Chloe and I found ourselves with a week without appointments or anything pressing, and so we drove to Kelowna to visit Kers and have a mini-vacation.It actually was the best decision.
We arrived int he evening and, after supper and putting the girls to bed, guitars and ukuleles came out and we projected notes from an app on the TV and played and sung some favourite tunes.
This is Kerstie and Adam's dog Ruby. She's a redbone coonhound puppy and slightly difficult to manage right now. She's the sweetest thing in the world and we all love her, but untrained hounds, whose habit it is to lead by their nose, are impossible to recall until they decide to come back hours and hours later, so she must stay on a leash for the moment.But that's just fine with me. I drove her out to my kid's property for the day.
The plan was for Chloe to finish laying the floor in her airstream and I would hike Ruby a couple of times around the 22 acres.
Kerstie and Adam's property is so beautiful that it's easy to hike there for hours.
And the views over Lake Okanagan and spectacular.
This can be bear and cougar country, so eventually Ruby will have an important role to play protecting her family.
Here is the view at the very top of the 22 acres.
I gathered some seedpods and twigs and grasses as subjects for drawing.
I found some deer antlers and a deer skeleton while I was hiking around...
...and so brought the children up to see them.They're great hikers and loved seeing the bones. Isla found the spot where the deer died and found a bunch of deer fur. So in the interest of science, we gathered some deer fur in our pockets to put on the science table...and promptly forgot about it.
We hiked down and found that Chloe had finished all she could of the floor for now. Those are the antlers I found.
A last few looks around, time to lock up the airstream, and head back to town.
Supper is almost ready, so naturally everyone has to swing.
So we said goodbye to my family and drove back to Vancouver to deal with a hectic week.Health checks and tests, a plumbing emergency at mom's house which has now required insurance and massive restorations, an emergency middle of the night visit to the hospital with Chloe. (She's alright but more health complications.) A new roof on my garage! Oh boy. The pits of real life.But at least the sun is shining after months and months of rain (marginal exaggeration).
And that was my November guys.I'm off for Christmas in OXON with Robbie and a bit of a break from real life in Vancouver.Mind you I just ger real life in the UK.At least the supernova has burnt itself out into a little dull and flickering flame.
A walk on an impulse just because it's sunny
Can you believe that the sun has come out for the first time in about 2 weeks?
I had a lunch hour meeting right here down by the ocean...
...and after the meeting, instead of being a good girl and going home and getting some work done in the studio, I headed for the mountains.
All the way up here to the Baden Powell trail.See down there at the shore? That's where I was 20 minutes ago!
And now I'm up here on this beautiful trail.
I'm so glad I made the effort to drive up here and go for a walk.
The autumn is a photographers paradise, isn't it?
And especially for me, because I tend to photograph into the sunlight all the time.
I know there are so many conventional rules of not photographing into the sun, but stuff that for a game of soldiers. I can't get enough of it.
It's been mild and rainy so the little trickles have turned into crystal streams.
And, while there's still a lot of green leaves on the trees, some have begun to turn all sorts of glorious colours.
As I walked along taking photos, I couldn't help but collect some of the leaves to bring home to have some fun with.
I dumped them all in a pile on my desk...
...and then I made myself a leaf rainbw.
It always surprises me how doing something artistic, no matter how small or simple, lifts my mood up by 100%.(But then, maybe it's the sunshine)
Hello from Sunday night and a last for the 1st of October
Hello from Sunday night everyone.Where has our September gone?I just blinked and it's October.
The weather's been really lovely, so we decided on one last dip in the ocean.Inspired by a lady swimming about, I was the brave one and walked in...
Slowly!One inch at a time!The stomach is always the worst.
Then Robert got in.
He went for the "just dive in" approach!
Next Chloe dipped her toes in.
Ata girl!
Then, the inevitable happened!
What a glorious last day for a swim.
After we dried off a little, Chloe and I went beachcombing.
Chloe was trying to find the perfect piece of driftwood for her airstream, but every piece she loved was attached to 20ft of log.
We stayed on the beach for an hour or so in the very warmth of the day.Now autumn has well and truly rolled in. Time for golden leaves, chrysanthemums and pumpkin spice, but this afternoon was the best way to wrap up our summer. :D
Hope you've all had a lovely summer and are now getting ready for fall.
The night of the advection fog
The strange white light in the meadow past the pine trees. Advection fog?The running like a maniac back to the cottage for my camera and the sprint back out again!
The trudging thru the nettles and brambles and thru the pines to get a better look.The magic!
It only lasts for a few minutes, but how glorious is it?
Back to the cottage
This switching countries thing of mine is here again.I have to leave Oxfordshire for a few months but I will take all my wonderful memories of this summer with me.
Office work
Hello my dears,Well, I almost did it.I almost completed all the Prague office work which I had to do.
My office work consisted of visiting four government offices for some document registration for my Czech...and therefore EU citizenship.And one of these offices is only open Monday 12-5.So happy-go-lucky me all fresh faced and cheerful set out this morning via train to Prague, then Metro, then tram and got to said office.
That all went well...I think.As long as everyone else I have to deal with is ok with my birth papers everything should be fine...that's my theory and I'm sticking to it.So, do you see the opera house over there in the distance? The dome shaped building?My first office was just past that building. That was the one which didn't open till noon.
And do you see Prague castle (Hradcany) in this photo?My second stop was waaaayyy behind that and they were closed for their lunch break from 12:30 to 1:30.Figures!
So, with so much time to waste have in luxurious Gothicness on the streets of Prague, I decided not to take the tram, but to walk off those thunder thighs.Now I take care to shoot some beautiful photos for you, but the reality of summer in Prague looks more like this!One way across Charles' Bridge...
...and the other way.You should have seen this last Sunday!!!Throngs and throngs of tourists and tour groups!
But I made it to Hradcany to have a second High Magistrate of Foreign Affairs certify my documents, only to be asked for a 100 crown Kelek stamp.A what?Oh, I get that at the post office, do I?Where's the nearest post office then?Oh, all the way back down the hill at Charles' Bridge you say?
You know what?Prague is just a great big huge Stairmaster workout!Hours and hours of stairs.No wonder all the girls here have great, long legs.But there's always a choice:The path up to the same place is gentler than the stairs but twice as long. You decide."Take the tram you silly girl!" you shout.Yes, but, the tram doesn't come here, so it's a bit of a sideways track and three times as long and thru Hradcany...which means throngs of tourists and a guard scan before you enter. Kind of like a duck choosing between confit or l'orange.
So here are two views from offices today. (sigh)I keep thinking that I could be somewhere visiting a beautiful castle, but some days must happen guys.
There we go. Second certification stamp plus Kolek stamp, plus everyone smiling about my documents, plus last of the three trips up and down these stairs!
Found the translation services, registered my Canadian documents for translation, and 4pm. Oh, wait, just realised I've only had a punnet of strawberries and a bottle of water all day.Do I dare show you my tired self and the bags under my eyes?Stuff's real guys, stuff's real.
So had a little stop in a street side cafe on St Wenceslas square for a bowl of chicken soup.
And some people watching.Now this is a great way to keep your school girls together...day glow hair bows.
And in my view were: a lady in waiting, a nutty kid with a ball who kept trying to drum on it while running round like crazy, a silver statue man who was in the right place to be ignored most of the time, girls walking past with these sexy little tule skirts (note to self, get one!), and I think that might have been a Lady GaGa wannabe!
Anyway, ate my soup and got back to the train station for 5pm.
Look it all the sleeping, tired people! Yup, one of them is me.Back to Prague tomorrow.